THE L♥VE CHAMBER
After trying and trying, is your marriage still on the brinks of separation? No matter how bad things may seem, there is always hope!
There comes a point in time when we must put our emotions and personal opinions aside to better hear what our partners are saying. So what, if their views usually lead to absolutely no where. The point is to give both parties a fair chance to speak their peace.(Besides if they don't have the opportunity to express themselves, how else would you know if there is a problem? You would find out eventually but only under different circumstances) Here are seven common ways to help create a better, more loving environment and tighter bond between you and your significant other.
1. Handle arguments differently
Every marriage and relationship has arguments, but it's how you weather those storms that could either stamp or break your relationship. When emotions are high, both of you are yelling and shouting to get your point across. But really, what does that solve? No one is truly listening or understanding especially when you're feeling verbally assaulted and compelled to defend yourself.
Even I sometimes have to bite my tongue so that I don't say something I would later regret. Having a naturally calm personality has admittedly made it easier for me to think before I speak than it is for some people. But that shouldn't stop anyone from trying. Your arguments should never turn physical this can cause irreparable damage. Both parties should ALWAYS keep their hands to themselves at all times and if you feel threatened in any way call 9-1-1.
2. Turn gossip and bashing into praise
No one is perfect. When the guys get together and the conversation turns to complaining about “what their wives do,” or wife bashing in general, refuse to participate. The same rules apply to women and their husbands. It shows that you respect and value your relationship. Instead, when a "gripe session" gets going, make it a point to start sharing some of her/his good qualities. Usually, this alone will steer the conversation into a positive direction and help your friends to also praise their husbands/wives -- which in turn helps them to respect and appreciate them more too.
3. Become Unpredictable
After a few months or years, most couples get into a comfortable zone where they always do or say the same things. Same dinner / movie dates, same sexual routine, positions and behaviors. Bring your relationship back to life. Show your partner that you are still fun to be around. Demonstrate to them that you can still be very exciting to hang out with. They say if you keep doing what you've been doing, then you will keep getting what you've been getting. Words of wisdom~
4. Make your dates more creative
Agree to go out and do something you've never done before once every week, every two weeks or at least once a month. (We're all busy) It doesn't really matter what you do, but it's important to commit and do it constantly. When you both converse don't forget to listen to one another and acknowledge what your partner said before making your statement. Want some ideas on where to go? Go to a winery, museum, art gallery, carnival, the library, the beach, bowling, or have a picnic in the park.
5. Spice things up under the sheets
Try new positions, techniques or locations. Wear some nice lingerie or boxers and it never hurts to introduce some role playing, new toys and body oils to the bedroom.
6. Change up the norm
Surprise her with a gift just to say “I love you," give her a nice massage, get him a gift of something from his childhood or set up a scavenger hunt that shows how much you care about him/her with a gift at the end. The best part about being you is, the person you love never has to wait for a Birthday or Valentine's Day because your kind of love is given all year round:)
7. Face your money issues and debts
One of the biggest problems facing couples today is the huge amount of debt they bring into their marriage. Not only are there more divorces, couples are calling it quits much earlier in their marriage than ever before. Here are some ideas to get your debt and money issues under control.
GOODIE ALERT for MEN:
New read "Getting Her Back... For Good" by Michael Webb, is great at providing a solid plan to get your ex-wife back, help heal your marriage and even prevent a divorce. To get your lover back now click here.