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The Love Chamber Xpress, Issue #025 -- Can You Make Him Yours?
August 26, 2014
Do You Think Your Partner is Cheating?
Welcome to Love in August, Special Edition Issue #025. Hi Lovers! Sorry the Xpress is late this month but I completely make up for it in this Issue. The question this Month is; Do you think your partner is cheating or are you assuming that your partner is cheating because of the way YOU define cheating?
Is it your birthday this month?
Awwww, it is?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEO'S!!!!!!
I would also like to wish a very Happy Birthday to:
What is a Cheater Anyway?
Do you think he/she's cheating… when they really aren't?
Before we begin, tell me which guys in the relationships below are cheating:
1. Hannah and Andre have been dating for 2 years. They've talked about getting married. She even thinks he’s been pricing some rings…
2. Elisa and Malik are like the “old couple” among their friends – they've been together now for 5 years, and even though they haven’t ever discussed marriage, she isn't seeing other guys. She refers to him as “my partner” and they have a vibrant sex life.
3. Jasmine and Darren started seeing each other about 4 months ago, and are ecstatically in love. They talk on the phone multiple times every day, and go out on a date several times a week. Last week he moved in with her.
Before you tell me which of the guys in these three relationships do you think is cheating, let me tell you this: Every single one of those guys is seeing other women.
Does that surprise you? Make you angry?
Before you start throwing things (and for the record, I just made those three couples up, and I realize I didn't give you much information to go on) you should know: the reason I ask is because I think this is an issue that pops up ALL THE TIME for women and men, and there’s a huge issue underneath the word “cheating”… And THAT’S the real issue we need to discuss…
How do most women define cheating?
Most women would tell you that if two people are “together” and one of them “sees” other people, that’s cheating. I’m not convinced there’s even one guy in the world who would agree with that definition.
And here’s why THAT is really, really bad for all the women in the world.
When a woman has that definition of cheating, she often completely gives over her life to a man who isn't doing the same. In other words, he’s “won” her and may now either a) lose interest, or b) enjoy and keep all the “benefits” of a relationship with her but never make a commitment, even though she’s made a commitment to him.
If you hope for and want to be married someday, you could lose years of your life this way, waiting for a man who isn't waiting for you.
So how SHOULD you define cheating? In my world, “cheating” is a word reserved only for two situations.
First, where two people have made a clear and explicit agreement to date only each other and one of them breaks that agreement.
And second, in a marriage when one person “dates” (meaning sees because they’re sexually or deeply emotionally interested in) another.
Why you should (both) date other people until you are (both) ready to commit?
There’s a big difference between dating and exclusivity. If you are a woman who is seeking a committed, exclusive relationship or marriage, one of the best things you could do to secure a commitment is to NOT be so easily won!
I’m not at all saying “play hard to get” – I’m saying look for the man who is going to commit, and don’t stop looking until you find him!
This actually not only keeps you from losing years of your life with a man who isn't going to commit, it also makes you extremely desirable among men! - Believe me, I know!
How to get him to commit to you?
First, you need to clearly communicate exactly how long you’re willing to date without a commitment.
Then, you need to keep dating other guys until the two of you explicitly agree to be exclusive.
I know it’s hard to spend time seeing, spending time with, and enjoying other guys when all you want is to fall happily into the arms of this one particular man, but until you two agree that you are each other’s “only and forever,” that’s the best path toward your dreams. Good Luck~
10 Tips to pleasuring your woman
Did you know that women can experience different types of orgasms and can even have multiple orgasms? It’s true!
Here are 10 tips to increase the chances she'll reach climax, including the secret to multiple orgasms:
Start outside the bedroom - Want to increase the chances she'll orgasm? When was the last time you surprised her with a letter or flowers and sent them to her at work? Believe it or not, creative and romantic gestures DO turn women on because love and lovemaking are interconnected in a woman’s mind. Do this and you can bet-your-bottom-dollar you'll be doing more than just eating dinner when she walks in the door! :)
Relax her - It’s very hard for women to orgasm if they are stressed. Give her a quick back massage. Rub her shoulders, upper back, neck and inner thighs to melt away the tension.
Ignore the vagina - Did you know that prolonged foreplay actually increases the chances of her coming? That's right. By kissing, caressing and touching her LONGER, you’ll build the sexual tension and often the anticipation will be very powerful.
Change your focus - If you focus all your attention on the woman first, you'll make love to her much more passionately. Think about it! If you've finished first and decide to help her come, you won't have the enthusiasm and passion that's needed to keep her hot and turned on.
Tip to last longer - Of course the first step to help her reach orgasm is by not coming. The best way I've found to not come is: Penetrate as normal and when you feel like you're about to come, simply move your hips in a circular motion (like swaying a hula hoop) and wait until the “little guys” subside again. Now continue pleasuring. :D
Don't use lubricants - Women have a natural lubricant that fills the vagina when they're turned on. By using a product substitute, you're only fooling yourself. Without products, you’ll instantly know if things are working; but with them, you can never be sure.
Never too much clitoris - Did you know that once you've stimulated the clitoris for some time, a little thing called the clitoral hood will actually come out and cover the clitoris to protect it from further direct stimulation? (And no, I'm not making this up!) The point is, once the clitoris is fully stimulated, make sure you pleasure the G-spot next, whether it be with your hand, tongue or penis.
Find and stimulate the G spot - The G-spot is a zone that feels like the roof of your mouth and is located about 2 inches inside the vagina on the topside. (On the underside of her stomach.) There are two basic ways you can pleasure the G. With your fingers by doing a “come here” motion or with a love position that helps hit the G-spot…
Use the best position - Not all love positions are made equal. The best one for women is the reverse missionary (woman on top). This is probably the easiest position for a woman to climax because she can control the friction to her clitoris and/or G-spot.
Give her oral sex - The single best way to help a woman reach orgasm, even multiple orgasms, is by going down on her (cunnilingus). While at first I didn't believe it, countless studies have been done to prove this fact. Oral sex is easier and much more satisfying for
women than intercourse is. Try the ABC’s with your tongue, ask what she likes, and mix it up
with lots of different movements! However be VERY careful! With over 6,000 nerve endings in the clitoris, make sure you know everything there is to know before poking your tongue around there, otherwise it could be really painful and, even worse, spoil the mood.
About the author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the author of Lick by Lick, the complete guide to giving women oral pleasure. Unfortunately, most men leave women frustrated and disappointed after cunnilingus. Learn to be one of the rare men who can satisfy her with oral sex by visiting the cunnilingus guide.
Catch Ya Next Issue #026 - It's All Love!
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